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"When one experiences truth, the madness of finding faults with others disappears" - S.N. Goenka.

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

The Stirring that Keeps Us Awake

Sometimes, in the dead of night, the silence stirs me awake.  Eyes open, blinking to a thumping heartbeat, moving away from dreaming and into the shadows of darkness.  “Why am I awake?” is always the first question, “Go back to sleep” is always the response.  Resisting wakefulness makes sleep run further away.  Finally surrendering to my stubborn mind, it wins and willfully opens the floodgates of thought.  Waiting for sleep’s intruder to present itself, I notice and pay attention, observing the thoughts playing in my mind.  Each minute the moving clock ticks, my heartbeats grow faster and louder. Anxiously the persistent thought repeats, “I’m still not sleeping! What is so pressing that must be handled right now?”